How to Propose: Real Engagement Stories That Prove There’s No ‘Right Way’ To Get Engaged.

God, I had no idea how to propose. It felt like I’d been planning for months. You feel like you get one crack of the whip because It’s The Most Important Moment Of Your Life (so far) and it has to Be Perfect!!

But how do you do it? How do you make it feel special?

If you Google how to propose, you’ll quickly be led to believe there is a correct formula. I’m typing this in December, and if you’re reading this at Christmas, chances are you’re feeling the pressure.

Christmas lights are everywhere. New Year’s Eve is looming. Someone, somewhere, is definitely about to get engaged on Instagram.

So instead of telling you how it should be done, I asked real people how they actually did it. These are not polished proposals. They are funny, heartfelt, chaotic, thoughtful and very human. The very definition of Awesome People, right here.

So if you’re thinking about how to propose, here are ten real ways people popped the question. Hope it gives you some inspiration.

1. Get a cartoon version of you to propose (Me)

Let’s start with me, because if you think you know how geeky I am, I’m about to knock your socks off.

Gareth’s birthday is on New Year’s Eve. He normally hates it for that reason. So I bought us a trip to Amsterdam. We’d spend New Year’s Eve at sea coming home. Normal so far.

It did not stay normal.

I convinced an animator friend of mine to do a very short cartoon where I’d battle his favourite things to get to him. It had cupcakes, sushi, monsters coming through Portals, before I threw the One Ring from Lord of the Rings at him whilst he played his Xbox.

I played it to him on the deck of a boat, in the middle of the North Sea, on New Year’s Eve, on his 40th birthday.

Five years later he told me he’d discovered the ring in my bag, so knew it was coming.

Which neatly proves that even when you try to plan everything to the max, half of your future fiancé’s will know it’s coming anyway…

2. You don’t have to propose just the once! (Rosie)

Sometimes proposals just happen in the minute – which is great! But sometimes you get that niggling feeling you could have done it different. So do what Rosie’s fiancé did – and propose again!

“The first time was a year after we met, on Christmas Day, in front of the tree. We chose the ring together, but I wasn’t expecting it for a while. The excitement took over and he asked me.”

Four years later, after “a few house moves and a baby”, he proposed again.

“He hired out a barn cinema, put up fairy lights and pictures of us throughout the years. When I looked down, he was on one knee.”

They watched Back to the Future cuddled up in an old horse carriage…

3. Choose your favourite place. And some bats. (Alex)

“We went to the zoo over Easter bank holiday weekend. He’d secretly booked an experience in the bat enclosure.”

Alex assumed it was just a thoughtful surprise.

“I really thought he just knew how much I love bats.”

Then he proposed.

“The best, spookiest proposal ever. The bat even posed for a pic with us afterwards.”

4. How to propose using Lego! (Lily)

An idea I wished I’d stolen, here. 

Lily’s partner bought her a lego set, which they built together on their anniversary.

But he’d sneakily hidden plans for a ring box inside.

“When I had finished building it, he brought out the centre “cushion” with my ring in it and asked me to marry him!”

Epic levels of genius.

5. Get it on camera! (Nikki)

This one hit home – mainly because I used to live down the road from where this proposal took place!

After a wonderful day in London, Nikki’s partner took her to the magical Greenwich Park at sunset – where you can see the whole of the city stretch out before you.

“He started to pose me for a photo in front of the skyline (which I thought was weird cos he’d literally never done that before) and then all of a sudden got down on one knee!

Honestly the whole thing was a blur my heart was beating so fast!”

What made this even more special was the fact her partner’s best friend was hiding behind a tree the whole time taking photos – so the moment’s treasured forever.

It’s a beautiful idea, and if it’s sparked a thought in you, get in touch…

6. How to propose at a Book Farm! (Lucie)

My first question to Lucie was “what’s a book farm!” and then I got lost in a google whirlpool of second hand books, log fires and ten-bob barns.

If you’re a romantic book-lover in the Midlands wondering how to propose, check out Astley Book Farm in Bedworth. It’s the largest second hand bookshop in the region and looks absolutely wonderful.

Lucie almost got the wrong end of the stick, but her proposal sounds perfect.

7. Get the kids involved!

Getting engaged is a huge thing for the family – so loads of people make the family an integral part of this special moment. Whether it’s recording videos, leaving notes or getting help in making a ring box, there’s nothing to say that you have to actually make the proposal yourself…

8. Make your own rings! (Anonymous)

This one made me bash my head on my desk it was so obvious. Here I am, the Jewellery Quarter’s Wedding Photographer, and it never occurred to me you can actually go make your own wedding and engagement rings.

It’s a brilliant idea – surprise your fiancé by proposing using a ring you’ve made together. If you’re local to Birmingham and wondering for a brilliant way to propose, why not check out a Wedding Ring Workshop at The Quarter Workshop in the Jewellery Quarter. I’ll buy you a cup of tea and some cake beforehand, if you need a photographer.

9. How to propose after a panic attack!

OK, this one’s not literal, but a good example of how the best laid-plans might not work the way you see them in your head – but the end result is just as perfect. Me? I’m absolutely terrified of heights, so I got scared just reading this.

“My fella was meant to propose at the top of the O2 arena.”

Problem.

“I’m terrified of heights.”

What followed included panic attacks, crying and a forgotten ring.

“He ended up proposing at the side of the bed because I was so cold I’d stripped off and jumped into bed.”

#romance.

10. How to propose at the top of the world

Right. This one might need some planning. And potentially a helicopter. But in terms of epic proposals, this deserves a magnificent place on this list.

“My son was on a military climbing expedition up Kilimanjaro.”

At the summit, he asked permission to use the satellite phone.

“He rang back to the UK and had someone get his girlfriend out of bed in barracks.”

From the roof of Africa, he asked her to marry him.

They’ve been married 21 years.

Thinking of proposing?

If you’re reading this because you’re quietly planning something of your own, first of all, hiya!

A few of the people above got someone to photograph their proposal – if that’s your thing then I’m happy to have a chat about how I can help. 

And if you’d rather soak up the moment first and book engagement photos afterwards, that works beautifully too. No pressure. No posing practice required. Just photos that feel like you.

If you’re planning a proposal, thinking about it, or just want to talk through ideas, drop me a message. I’m always happy to help you figure out something that feels right, whether it’s big, small, chaotic, or quietly perfect.

Coming up in part two…

Christmas Day proposals, New Year proposals, escape rooms, dolphins, drag queens and Metallica…